This is the form that my boredom takes.
My superpower is that I can get sea shanties stuck in people's heads. #nonsense
— Laurel Green (@Laurel_Green) June 1, 2014
It’s revenge for having The Girl from Ipanema stuck in my head for 10 years.
Ugh. Why did I get the Twizzlers with the goo inside? #candy
— Laurel Green (@Laurel_Green) June 3, 2014
Nothing is improved through the addition of goo.
People are terrified of the production logos at the end of old cartoons? Actual thing or Internet hoax? #phobias
— Laurel Green (@Laurel_Green) June 6, 2014
This “scary logos” thing can’t possibly be real, can it? It just seems so stupid.
Yeah, Internet, you can try as hard as you want, but you're never going to convince me that capybaras are #cute.
— Laurel Green (@Laurel_Green) July 3, 2014
Icky, giant guinea pigs.
I was supposed to be getting supplies for #HurricaneArthur, but I came back with beer instead.
— Laurel Green (@Laurel_Green) July 4, 2014
Beer has very important nutrients in it.
Why do storms only ever have white people names? #HurricaneArthur
— Laurel Green (@Laurel_Green) July 4, 2014
This probably isn’t true, but I’m not looking up all the names of all the different storms.
Dammit, the power has been knocked out already? How will my beer stay cold!? #HurricaneArthur
— Laurel Green (@Laurel_Green) July 5, 2014
I almost died.
Chicken fingers can be breakfast too. #foodie
— Laurel Green (@Laurel_Green) July 9, 2014
I live like a frat boy.
People think that they can eat ice cream and walk at the same time, but they can't. #annoyances
— Laurel Green (@Laurel_Green) July 24, 2014
Tourists are the worst.
— Laurel Green (@Laurel_Green) July 31, 2014
— Laurel Green (@Laurel_Green) July 31, 2014
I go do other things now.